Finally a real question I can actually see someone living and I am sure a lot of others who deal with disciplinary issues.
Talking to him has run its path and he probably wouldn't understand even if you had the perfect solution for his life written out in a step by step format.
Boys who are trying to grow up without a dad in their life have a tendency to rebel and make decisions that are going to wreck havoc on the people they live around because they strive to maintain that manly power in the way they deem as appropriate. Unfortunately he never learned the proper way and is stuck in a child's mind and a young mans body.
Action will have to be the start of this revelation. You need to stop being the enabler, allowing him to come and go and do as he pleases by locking him out at night and calling the authorities if he gets out of control. If he is still unwilling to conform to a more respectable life for you and your daughters then not letting him move into your new home will be your only solution.
He may need a guidance counselor who will spend the time to figure out lucrative options by not just demanding but painting a picture of a better more progressive life anyone could be happy with. Military or a community college isn't something you can demand a child without guidance of some kind and their are resources out there who would discipline and educate him into a state of awareness.
All he has to do is look you up to find you so you wont be able to hide forever so I think you should start by putting your foot down and requiring him to suffer real consequences if he doesn't take the lead.
I never let things get out of hand to the point it creates a total failure. Raising a child is a constant battle of mixing good and bad emotions with rewards and consequences. So start implementing consequences and do not take no for an answer.
Id like a real man like me to look him in the eye and ask him wtf he thinks he's doing to his mom and her two little daughters? Teach him how real men deals with any response but. "I'm sorry sir I will change and wont do it again."
- Response by diglebe2, A Guy Critical, Male, 29-35, Self-Employed Rating Received: 
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